Friday, July 08, 2005
verbal diarhoea
The london blasts. Currently i'm feeling a mix of emotions. Anger, indifference and sadness, but indifference takes a huge chunk of this mix. Maybe indifference isn't a good word, lemme explain and then maybe someone can gimme a better word for it. After the 9/11 incident, when the twin towers collapsed, that scene was forever imprinted in my mind. Any other terrorist attack seemed like peanuts next to that. The emotions that i experienced then, somehow can't be replaced or shaken by anything else anymore. The horror, shock and disbelief of seeing a scene that seemed out of a action thriller film rather than reality shook me so much that now the blasts seem like nothing much. But everyone has the words terrorist attack on their lips but really, how terrifying can this be as compared to that?
That said it's still ghastly for something like this to happen, especially to innocent hapless people who most probably had no say in such a thing happening to them. Especially the english stand in the iraq war. Even if they silently protested and were upset about england's participation in the iraq war, they had no say but yet, they are the ones who suffer. Suffer for a choice they had no control over. One of the analysts that BBC news brought in said that the attack was meant to generate maximum chaos rather than maximum death when there were at least hundreds and thousands of people at trafalgar square celebrating london's winning bid in the 2012 olympics.
But if you think about it such horrible attacks happen so often in palestine & isreal nobody bats an eyelid when they hear about it. In fact i think most people just flip the newspapers and skip that small column, in their hearts they most probably go oh what's new. Well i admit to doing that, i know, apathy. It's because it's Britain, people will exclaim and throw up their hands in horror, appalled by the callousness of such an attack. It differs if you are a first world country or a second world country, don't talk about the third world. It differs if your daily alarm clock isn't the missiles or bullets ricocheting but something that goes rrrrrring. Sad. It differs if you have no major TV station that is sold to the other cable tv corporation. It differs if your media can't articulate it as well as the others can. It differs because you ought to be used to it while our daily grind consists of squeezing with hordes of people on the tube. And maybe because our train system is called the tube and not something else.
Of course nobody deserves to be put through such horror. Especially the chaos within the subway. I can imagine the trauma really. From hearing the blasts, to regaining your senses after it, then trying to scramble your way to safety, but everyone else around you is just as disorientated and lost and confused. Blind leading the blind. Within an enclosed space, smoke, glass shards, blood, screams, people running, pushing. Horrific.
One of the reasons why i wanted to pursue psychology was that the trauma of such a situation happening to you, can sometimes paralyse a person so much that he/she is totally unable to function. That hopefully in my small little way i can help the world become a better place, and not let the world turn into a world where people are zombies tied to horrific events they cannot erase outta their minds. That these innocent people who survived, don't just survive but live strong after that. Because these people with that situation as a catalyst can be driven to make this world a better place.
Actually i don't feel so indifferent afterall. More like rage. sorry for the incoherence. I ought to go hit my books now. Exams in a few days time. I miss my darling. back to my daily grind where my alarm clock goes rrrrrring, and i don't see bloodied people at the corner of a street. Sorry for the verbal diarhoea think i need sometime before i regain my footing. I'm honestly saddened and angered.
Unknown at 3:30 am