Thursday, May 22, 2003
I realised i have a strong dependence on him. I still wish he were still with me. I feel so lost and floundering about like an aimless fish in the deep blue sea. No one to help me with animes, computers, driving skills, no one to keep me entertained by fake fighting wif me, no one to make silly faces just to make me larf, no one to lie on top of me and making me feel flatter(not the way he does it anyway), no one to support and encourage me in the way he does(he does it the way I've been conditioned to receive and give, like an athlete), no one to rush over when i say i'm stressed. No more, no more, no more...... No one to tell me stuff about cars, computers and animes in the same depth as him. I still miss his voice, his face, his messy hair.
Was giving him up the best option? Or maybe i should have given another shot to make it work. This is so difficult.
Unknown at 1:21 am